DO YOU want to get rid of bad feelings, bad memories, bad
thoughts or bad behaviour?
Did something happen in your past, or is
happening in your life now, that you just can't talk about and you need help without talking about it?
Are youvery, very
stuck? And very certain that if things don't start changing, very bad
things will happen?
Are you going throughHell?
Are you an emotional mess? Are youemotionally bleeding? Are you in severe emotional
pain some of the time? Most of the time? All of the time?
Is there a lot at stake? Do youHAVE to get better?
ARE YOUkeeping a
secret that is ruining your life?
Have yougiven up all
hope of having a better past?
Are you constantly haunted byterrible memories from your
Are you suffering from a recurring memory that is very traumatic and
disturbing and you want tobrainwash the memory
away or twist it to make it more
Do you want to heal awound that
doesn't bleed? Do you want to resolve past conflicts and emotions? Is
there a whole in you somewhere, if only you could find it?
Do you want to stop living with thechoices you didn't know you made when you were
Do you want toemotionally
rewrite your childhood script so it can have a different
Do you want toerase a
memory or forget your past? Is there something about your past
you want to change? Do you want tobreak
free from your past?
ARE YOUunsure what the trouble
was that started all of this?
Did youturn your feelings
off a long time ago to keep yourself safe and now stuff is
happening and the feels are back and you would really rather they didn't hurt?
Are sections of your past giant blanks or voids and you want to know why? Are
you gettingdisturbing memories back and you want to know if they're real or not?
Did you have aphysically-violent, emotionally-violent or sexually-violent
childhood and it's affecting your life now in ways you wish
Are you wondering if it's possible to stop feeling socially broken or
irreversibly damaged because you'rehaunted by past rapes, sexual
exhibitions, sexual humiliations, sexual interferences, sexual assaults, sexual coercions or sexual
HAVE YOU had enough of being
Would it be nice to be able tocalm down?
madness be a big improvement?
disguised as a responsible adult?
Do you experience extremeinner
agitation and tension?
Do you act normal on the outside but you're
thewalking wounded on the inside and you want to start changing things?
Do you have lots of complaints and you wished it wasn't so difficult to
articulate exactly what's wrong? Do you have so much to say and you justcan't get the words out?
Do you keep doing something over and over again and
it'sout of control and you want to stop and you can't stop because there's something stopping you
enraged in the time between two heartbeats? Are you hurting
another living thing with your voice or your actions and you want to stop?
Is the list of places you can go or people you can be
withslowly but surely shrinking?
Can you beoverwhelmed by
panic in the most ordinary of circumstances and you want to
change it? Does getting into a car, bus, train or plane freak you out and it's time it didn't? Does leaving the
house or going shopping freak you out and it's time it didn't? Do you have to pace? Do the second and third and
fourth thoughts rush in and tumble over each other before the first one has a chance to finish? Do you get
highly anxious or agitated in certain circumstances and you have to escape? Wondering why you can't be at peace
like everyone else?
DO YOU wake up to a
rainbow of failure?
Do you want to feel
Do you want to make itChristmas
in the trailer park?
Is your life in the bargain basement and you want to start heading upstairs?
Do you hate who you've become and what you do and it's time for a change? Are you secretly ashamed of what's
going on inside you? Do you starve yourself or stuff yourself (or both) and you want to change it? Is all you
want for Christmas a fast metabolism and a thigh gap? Do yourip
yourself apart on the inside and cut yourself on the outside and
you want to stop?
DO YOU have to bedrunk or druggedall the time?
Is rehab for quitters?
Arewithdrawals God's way of saying "You're still
Do youwish it was possible to just
inhabit your own brain and not have to silence it with cloudiness? Want to sleep sober but the carnival of
characters in your head won't let you? Have you ridden a tidal wave of
alcohol on a surfboard made of "I don't care"?
ARE YOU terrified to go to sleep?
Have you hadmany lost
nights that you've buried deep, deep
Are there lots of black things trapped in
thedark behind your eyes?
Are you terrified to wake up? Is waking up in
adeath sweat an ordinary bad night for you?
Did you go away to war and you saw some bad shit and you did some bad shit
and now you're back and anew war is raging inside
you and you need to find some peace somehow? Are the flashbacks
and nightmares and panic getting to the point where you can't take it any more? Is the twitching and shouting
in your sleep freaking out your partner?
ARE YOUobsessed with a former
partner and you want to let go?
Have relationships been adisaster area for you and you want to change it
for next time?
Does yourpartner have a
problem and you have a problem with your partner's
Are you trapped in adying
relationship? Don't know whether to stay or leave? Want out but don't
know how? Lots of issues that are hurting the relationship? Just about to separate or
Do you refuse to believelove is
for the young?
Isintimacy something you want and fear, and you
want the fear to get smaller?
ARE YOUliving to
Do you have ablack heart of
dream that keeps you from sleeping?
Have things got worse and worse over a long period of time
andyou're scared you're eventually going to kill yourself?
Do you want totake an
axe to the next person who says "cheer up", "smile", "endure",
"just tough it up", "try to be happy", "take it one day at a time", "take small steps", "you should be over it
Do you wish 'pain' was an accurate description of what's going on inside you,
rather than 'ultrapain'? Is
your pain not able to be measured? Are you wondering what's worse, being in so much pain that: 1) you're scared
you might die, or 2) you're scared you might not?
Are you not quite dead butpretty fucking numb? Is it difficult to know whether
you're alive and dreaming, or dead and remembering? In a very dark place at the bottom of your hole and you
just want to stay there until nothing matters? At your worst moment - mentally, physically and emotionally?
Finding it hard to fight for life and you wish it was easier? Are you doing EVERYTHING you can not to die? Do
you feel as if there's no way out, no hope and no chance of an end to your suffering? Are you spending all your
time planning your suicide? Are you at the point where it's change or die? Do you have even a teensy-weensy
hope that someone, somewhere could show you how to save your life? Would you be surprised to learn that you can
turn weapons of self-destruction into weapons of self?
IS YOURIQ in
Sick of the advertisingrunning
in your head?
Do you just want your mind to stop goingwild piggy on you?
Are you highly-intelligent, highly-educated and highly-miserable and two out
of three ain't bad? Are you a nerd or a geek and maybe one day you'll be a nerdfighter but right now you want
to reformat your brain because there areghosts in the
machine that have to go?
Are you a highly-paid executive and you'reliving a lie and you want to change things fast
before people start finding out?
ARE THERE some
thingspills can't fix?
Are all the pillsfucking with
Sick of everyone telling you whatyou already know?
Do you wish there was a pill marketed as "fast emotional pain relief"?
Have you already changed a lot and been successful and now
you'vehit a wall?
Are you going to bring the fire of a thousand suns to burn the next person
who suggestsanother fucking self-help
Have you been diagnosed with a mental disorder or mental illness (or other
fantasy) and taken a lot of pills and done a ton of therapy and you're asmiserable as ever and you're sick of
HAVE YOU beenbuttfucked by fortune once too
Wondering why bad things keep
happening to you?
Does the world seemuncanny or
Have you realised something about yourself or the world that explains a feeling
ofpervasive dread? Are
you bothered by people looking at you, talking about you or judging you? Do you hear voices that other people
don't hear and they bother you? Do you see things that other people don't see and what you see bothers
DO YOU just want
tolive a little?
Trying to decide whatdespair
Think you picked the wrong time to be a human being? Do you
Has the Rapture been and gone and you wereleft behind?
Did someonecrush your
soul and put out the light in your dark
Are you just another soul with feelings but
there'snobody there to feel the pain?
Do you wish you could have anout-of-body experience just so you could talk
to yourself about what you're doing with your life?
Do you want to experiment withgiving up on someone else's dream for
Do you schlep around the house everyday insweatpants and disappointment and it's time the
Fun Bus started stopping outside?
Would you love to get to the place where
youcan't be bothered to be anyone other than yourself?
Are your parentsdriving you
crazy and you've started looking for nursing homes with the
highest rates of elder abuse?
Have you beencrying every
day for 20 years and you don't want to do it for the next
Were you in a bad accident and you want tostop replaying it?
Did someone check out on you years ago and it carved
agiant hole in your life and they're there right now in the lines on your face, filling your house up with their
"gone" and you wish it still didn't feel like yesterday?
Have you put yourhappiness on
hold for way too long and now it's time for "Go ahead,
ARE YOU at acritical
crossroads in your life?
Have you made a decision toreduce stress in your
Have you, perhaps surprisingly, reached a point in your life where it seems
you need to seek out some sort of "helping
Going through a very difficult time in your life's circumstances? Has a lot
of life happened to you recently and things arespiralling out of
control? Does it feel like you're stuck on the fast train to
Crazyville and you want to get off? Really nervous about a big life-changing event?
Need help re-discovering yourself? Need help making peace with your past?
Need a new way to look at problems in your life? Need to step beyond your normal thought patterns and don't
know how? Want tobreak through some bad
patterns into a better understanding of yourself and those around
you? Want to know why you think, remember, feel and act the way you do?
Unsure where to turn next? No clue what to do? Don't know anymore how to get
back to where you once have been? Does absolutely no one around you understand what you're going through?
Rarely talk to anyone about what's going on inside you? Have nobody to turn to for advice, or no one safe to
turn to? Considering getting some extra guidance and support? Searching for a voice of reason and
empathy?Need a good laugh?
From: Owen Pearn
Subject: Your future
I know how tough this stuff can
I can help.
to stay home. We'll work via Skype or over the phone. It doesn't matter where you are in the
"I have gotten release working with Owen that I have not experienced with
anyone else" (USA)
"Thank you Owen for getting to the heart of the matter so quickly"
"If you are in any kind of distress, working with Owen is the greatest
thing you can do for yourself" (Canada)
"You never let me get so far" (Scandinavia)
"Owen ... has been very suppotive of my choice of technique. He's one
cool dude." (USA)
"Amazing, thank you so much." (Spain)
"very productive chat with Owen, who gave me practical and fresh
"Got a very intresting session from Owen, and learned sooo much about
myself, about kinestethic signatures." (Scandinavia)
"Nah, shouldn't be Owen Parachute... should be Owen FANTASTIC!!!!"
"you're brilliant" (anon)
"ppl can be important" (anon)
"you very likely saved my soul" (anon)
"a big curtain has lifted" (anon)
"Thank GOD!! so how... how do I change this!!"
"Ive done it to all the stuff and its worked"
ABOUT YOU AND ME AND TIME AND MONEY
I work very differently from most other "helping
It's okay to lie to me.
It's impossible to offend me. Although, every time you argue with me,
somewhere a fairy dies. (Fairy mortality update: many fairies have died).
It IS possible to scare me but it's pretty difficult. You're welcome to
You can tell me anything but you don't HAVE to tell me anything (you can
keep it all private if you want). I can teach you how to change stuff without having to know any of the
I often start where others finish.
I like to go REALLY fast.
If you want, I'll make lots of space, very quickly. This often creates a
vacuum. Which often attracts lots of new stuff.
I cannot heal you or fix you because you're not broken and I'm not a
If you're not interested in woo and you're not interested in pharma and
you're not interested in medicalising ordinary human experience, I am interested in you.
I'm quite happy to chat at no cost to you
for half-an-hour or so, and then you can decide if you want to take things further. Your first step is to do your
Secret Survey (All About
You have to be at least 18.
I work completely outside the medical system. I do not report to any
insurance company or government agency (either in your country or mine).
The fee covers three components in each contact-period:
1) A Skype or phone session where we chat for 90 minutes, sometimes
a little longer.
the couple of days after each session, I will spend a few hours summarising my notes of the session plus any
other thoughts I've had about you plus homework links to webpages, video clips, books and other references that
I think apply to your personal situation and I will email you all that (no separate charge for
Between sessions, any time you want, as many times as you want, email me with questions and updates (eg. "NOW
LOOK WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"). I WANT you to do this! The more questions the better, because it means we can go
fast. I will reply by email as helpfully as I can, as soon as I can (no separate charge for this). If it's
complicated, it sometimes has to wait until the next time we chat.
Scheduling: How often we chat is up to you. After we've chatted a bit,
I'll have a much clearer idea of what might best suit you.
I work nights, weekends and holidays because I chat with folks all over
the world and the timezone differences are often crazy. Sometimes it's way outside normal hours where you
are and just another day at the office for me, and vice versa.
14 Relationship Tips You've Never Heard Before (29
unstuck. Relationship finality. Attraction. How to have a fabulous
relationship. Intimacy, intimidation and
threat. Arguments and right and wrong. What to do to improve your relationship. Secrets
and betrayals. How to think about couples counselling. Read transcript
6 Common FasterEFT Mistakes And How To Avoid Them (39
We spend 99% of our time in trances so we can successfully operate in the world.
The more strongly we believe a painful trance, the more it hurts. A trance is a "crossing over". Are you crossing
over everywhere, except where you need to go? Are you constantly crossed over to bad trances? Are you not crossing
back soon enough? Are you not crossing over at all? Are you crossing back, but not crossing over? Are you crossing
over and back once, and you think you're finished? Part of the price of change is giving up some certainty about
some of what you believe to be true. Read
What happens when we're stuck - Tyrone's restaurant problem
Our problem is blindingly obvious to everyone around us, except us. We genuinely
want to make things better but it's not safe to change anything. We naturally do "harder, better, faster, stronger"
which just gives us more practice at doing our problem. Sometimes when we're pushing really hard "here", we need to
push "over here" to move something "here". The thing that we need to do is sometimes the thing that we don't want
to do. Read transcript
My YouTube channel:
I NEVER DREAMED I'D BE A COUNSELLOR
The short version is: I used to find life really difficult and now I
I've been to Hell and the view wasn't that great and all I brought back was a lousy
teeshirt and transcendent emotional freedom. The whole gory story ishere.
PRIVACY AND ANONYMITY
Access to this website is logged by IP Address. I cannot determine your
street address or name.
IT DOESN'T MATTER ...
you are, or where you are, or how old you are, or what you saw, or what you thought you saw, or what you heard, or what you said, or what you didn't
say, or what you did, or what you
didn't do, or what was done to you, or what wasn't
done for you, or what was taken from
you, or what was forced upon you, or what you
lost, or what you never had, or what you'll never
have, or what you're looking
"Why is my partner making my life miserable?" ~ "I get so lonely sometimes I
set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me." ~ "Why does it feel
so good to feel so bad?" ~ "I just want to stop freaking out in traffic." ~ "I'm 50 years old and I can't
believe my life is crap." ~ "I can feel feelings now and they hurt." ~ "I've tried everything and I'm desperate." ~
"I have an anxiety disorder that makes it hard to find a job that fits my high IQ. I fear that my fiancee will
leave me for this, and I'll kill myself from depression." ~ "My friend ended his life. Since then, I feel like I
won't ever be happy again. Sometimes, I think I should do the same as he did. I'm tired to be sad and crying
because of his death." ~ "I feel like my marriage is dead from inside. I have no way of getting out other than
killing myself. I can not even do that as I don't want to leave my children." ~ "I find myself constantly running
my tongue in a circle over the spot on the roof of my mouth where I plan to put the barrel." ~ "I've never told
anyone this before." ~ "I want to take this razor and sign your name across my wrists." ~ "I gave it to them, so
they couldn't take it from me." ~ "I just want the nightmares to stop." ~ "My father raped me hundreds of times." ~
"I want to avoid PTSD memories during the day." ~ "I'm a grown woman and I'm still cutting." ~ "Did I lock the car?
Did I lock the car? Did I lock the car? Is it clean enough? Is it clean enough? Is it clean enough?" ~ "It's been
lovely but I have to scream now."