It often hurts when we FEEL something to be true which is the OPPOSITE of what we KNOW to be true.
Pain arises in the conflict and tension between the positive and negative necessities of our problem (the “symptom”) - a double-bind.
Being aware, cognitively, of an implicit memory doesnt change the memory. Cognition occurs in the neo cortex and implicit memory in the limbic system. These two brain systems work separately and dont understand the same language. Cognitive input wont change the way one feels and a cognitive / emotional disconnection can persist in the face of rational belief to the contrary. We dont have a single brain we have a number of systems that are bi lateral, they can work together or they dont have to. When they are incongruent we have the problems that bring people into therapy. (The pro and anti symptom positions). When implicit memories are triggered behavior is often at its worst. Few people have the insight to see beyond the behavior and take an Adlerian perspective that all behavior is goal driven. (Robert Hafetz)
Emotions are NOT signals of things being wrong.
Emotions are signals of things being IMPORTANT.
We do our FIRST SUFFERINGS to KEEP US SAFE from our SECOND SUFFERINGS.
Our first sufferings are conscious - they’re the things we bitch about.
Our second sufferings are not initially conscious because they are MUCH worse than our first sufferings, and they are stored in a different part of our brain.
Good news: The brain is designed to remember and forget.
Juxtaposition experiences (not words) re-wire limbic schemas.
When we permanently forget how to be bothered by something, we gain new behavioural choices in the future.
When we remove intense negative emotional themes, we reduce stress and we increase peace, happiness and flexibility.
reconsolidation is the natural, lifelong process by which all humans learn new things.
we can use “guided reconsolidation” to change our problem learnings.
we do our problems over and over and over again because our problem learnings are locked.
locked learnings can’t be changed until they’re unlocked.
to “erase” a problem learning, we first unlock it, then replace it with a new learning.
using the vocabulary of coherence therapy (bruce ecker, unlocking the emotional brain), we create a few juxtaposition experiences over a few minutes.
a juxtaposition experience is the near-simultaneous experience of a symptom-requiring schema (our problem) and a contradictory new schema (the new learning we want to do instead).
a juxtaposition experience is a “huh?” experience - something that the problem learning finds mismatched/unexpected/surprising/confusing/astonishing/contradictory.
the problem schema and new schema have to be set up and safe and everything must be done “experientially”.